Category Archives: Musings

Turn of the decade!

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A decade passed….and another is on the horizon… I reiterate that I hold no fancy for dates, days and all such…but wanted to jot this down so that the thoughts take form and can be revisited…..in a way I feel this is quite a significant decade since 20’s-30’s bring about a lot of change in every person’s life or I may think so…..and the blog is my journal 🙂

I haven’t changed much as person in my beliefs, values , priorities and such but still there is a giant leap in how I react and how I handle things …….If in 2000 someone told me that I’d end up today in the present state of mind that would have been the biggest joke….yet here I am and loving myself……and whatever highs and lows have hit me am extremely happy how I’ve turned out….yes, I really am super happy about how I have ended up as a person and I can love myself…isn’t that a very beautiful space to be ? And it brings such inherent happiness that I can share the positivity around too….
I am not too full of myself…but like what I made of myself….

Life is what happens when one is busy making plans of it….and life happened quite a bit for me…. I have seen deep lows….and today thank those lows since they shaped me more…..I wouldn’t have ever dreamt that I could challenge each low and emerge out of it with a major high….yes, it did happen….and if you see the confident, so sure of what to do with life and what one wants, in front of you today I dedicate it to those lows….the grit and determination which I never ever imagined I possessed surfaced and surprised me when I hit rock bottom……and the experience I carry today gives me the strength to deal with whatever life throws…am not saying I don’t get hurt or sad…I do of course….but then there is nothing or no one who can put me down so much so that it depresses me to a level where in I blame myself…..

The biggest hurdle I crossed this decade it to stop imagining and viewing and understanding myself from somebody else’s point of view and what a lesson I have learnt……today am a free person with rights, dignity and responsibility.

I live my life…just mine…and how hard can that be. And to do that with no botheration whether people out there in the world conform to my choices or not ….it sets me free….and for me truly defines what freedom means….

Ring in,Ring out

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The time of the year ……when one looks back and reminisces the past 12 months….

I am the types who isn’t very excited about the New Year…I admit it’s a nice time and new beginnings and all….glad about it but am not the one to get caught in the frenzy…I prefer staying home rather than attending new year parties…and If I do attend it’s always a small gathering with people who matter…..just as any other get-togethers which happen round the year…..with no hoopla attached…..

During school days a new year meant lots of cakes….my dad would be gifted quite a few of them and we would gorge on them for days …..And to top it they came in very fancy shapes…butterfly, bird, rabbit etc…..we didn’t engage in the cake cutting tradition for birthdays …..so I associate cakes with New year…and this was the most exciting part…..since eggless cakes in such abundance was not easy to source in Hyderabad then ….and these came from special orders with the yummiest flavors……
Apart from that it was also about the Diaries he gets gifted…..I would hoard them all ….for writing journals, doing maths, scribbling randomly….everything……I am a diary addict….bring them on 🙂

Today morning when dad came visiting he got me the new diary for 2011….and it brought back all these memories …..it felt truly special….here I was managing teams and running a house and considering all grown up and then my dad treats me as the same old little girl ;I feel special , very special….and parents are that way isn’t it ? I love it…and my dad is a man of very few words….yet the tradition of diaries continues till date (he’s never missed providing them each year) 🙂

The year that is passing by has had its hits and misses…with all those that life offered I emerged stronger, confident and elucidative about what I want…what defines me….I guess the most titillating journey is of self-introspection and this year I can proudly say that I have discovered a major part of myself…..in a way I can vouch that I am coming of age…..and I quite like that…..

I wish and hope the learning never ends ,be it any year ….the journey remains as tantalizing as ever…and I pray humbly to the almighty to administer in me the strength to experience whatever the future beholds , be it bouquets or brickbats….to remain elegant and dignified and march ahead with sophistication……

Have a Happy New year folks! See you on the other side

Pleased about

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• A bunch of stuff I picked up from the ongoing crafts mela. Am Loving it!

• Huge mups of coffee and Kadak chai….love both of them equally…..and for me they take a new dimension in winters….

• An exciting new profile at work which is going to start from the 1st week of Jan….looking forward for the new year and that also means…I am totally workless and vela now…How awesome is that? I admit it gets boring at times but I still love it.

• Had been interviewed by a very senior manager from the US for this profile and he hired me in 10 minutes flat (though I don’t have prior exp in this domain) and its been a great conversation. He went on to say that mine had been one of the most interesting CV’s he’s come across….My smile lasted the whole weekend……

• During the discussion he asked me what would I consider my primary skill….and I said “ I love technology , people ,change equally and I believe one cannot exist without the other” ….and it came on-the-spur of the moment…not one bit designed…. and I felt like a celebrity being interviewed….But I give the credit to him ….Interviewing is an Art and I personally believe the interviewer should be as clued in as the interviewee…and yes I always prepare when I am an interviewer too since I understand it’s a huge responsibility….and its pivotal to make the interviewee comfortable.

• Random compliments totally unexpected…..of course its about shedding a few pounds….all the more nice since there aren’t any efforts in that direction….and it came from quite a few people….so liking it…

• This time of the year…..the last 6 months especially have been very crappy at work and took immense toll…I am very pleased to be back to my normal self….

• Of being back to blogging even if the posts are without a rhyme or reason……but then my blog is titled random musings…..does it still need an explanation? 🙂

• Almost after an whole year opened up the box where my wooden blocks are stored and felt super joyful…they are my treasures…now I’d really wish to print a few designs….they are all over my mind.

• A good dose of books at home …..pretty self-explanatory. 🙂

Have a great day !

Winters and Me!

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Weather in Hyderabad is at its best now….reminds me of the Hyderabad from childhood…of school days where sweaters were worn, quilts for chilly nights, the morning dense fog, the nip in the air, Biryani at home, made more often than usual ….when relatives visiting from Vizag complained how terribly cold Hyderabad gets and I would defend saying we have all the seasons here and felt extremely proud of my city ( I felt like a celebrity when I could walk in a t-shirt whereas my cousins visiting were all bundled up….Yes, I truly love my city)….there I was missing Copenhagen a week ago and here I am falling in love with my city all over again….well, one can have two loves when it comes to cities , ain’t it ? 🙂

On the usual oh-so-routine days the weather primarily dictates my moods, how much ever I complain of the chill…I love winters…and while most of them around would be agonizing over it one can spot me walking with a smile plastered on…..and craving coffee….how absolutely delish it becomes in winters….the aroma of fresh brew wafting around on a chilly day/night turns me poetic and super happy……

Of course am going to miss a white Christmas….I love snow….the all pervasive knee high Scandinavian snow couldn’t alter my opinion, instead it made me love winters even more…..I know summers in Northern Europe are beautiful and I agree but it’s the snow which warms my heart….there are very few things more resplendent than fresh bright mounds of snow ….and yes I had been through it all, the chill so bad that my skin broke and bled, the runny nose, throat infection, the viral attacks when the snow starts melting, the slippery ice…….and many more…but the love affair continues…..Such is life….and these are the moments I cherish ….and thank god for….the satiating feeling when I step back and watch the world move on and the warmth which surrounds me …these observations of nature which make life beautiful and enriching….the way I feel all humbled and mellow with such magnificent universal forces around…..I Surrender……

Tagged!

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Been tagged by Madhu to list out my five addictions. Going by my fondness for tags I immediately jumped off the couch to write this. Lately I had been caught by a severe bout of writing hebetudinous , hence the incessant absence from blogging land. And this tag just suspended that.

Although its quite a task to stop at just five. Though I am not a person of obsessive habits, I have my fair share of manias. And after much deliberation here come my top five,

1. Books : To call them an addiction is an understatement. I am a book lunatic. They are like drugs to me. I read crazy. I simply love it. And am very deeply attached to them. I also have this silly fear since childhood, that if I don’t read or write anything that day, I will be left behind in the world. 🙂 Absurd , ain’t it?

2. Water : I gulp down gallons of it. I just need to have a bottle of it around me all the time else am distressed. I sip it like every 5 mins, Yeah all through the year and in all weather conditions.

3. Block-Printing : I professed my love for it time and again in this space. Am vehemently addicted to it. In fact anything ethnic and handicrafty is my cup of tea. I have a large corner in my heart for arts,crafts, weaves, antiques, traditional stuff. They are my Nirvana.

4. Kohl : All forms of it, be it Kajal/powder/eyeliner, am game. I love its smudged look. Gives a lot of character to the eyes. It has monumental significance in my life 🙂

5. FruitYoghurt : Be it home-made or store bought I have an appetite for it anytime of the day. I indulge in it perpetually and feasting on it transcends and soothes me. Its therapeutic.

Ok, folks now share yours and let me have a peek. Its open to everybody who finds this little rattle brained space of mine interesting.

My musings

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I have been married for over an year now. S and I lived in another town for a while and are now back to Apna Hyderabad. We currently live with S’s parents. Don’t know where the future will take us. Ok, now why am I giving these mindless details ? That means since the past one year + , I do not live with my parents.But till date when I think,talk about “my house” its always my parents house…And am sure it will always remain to be…..Does this happen  with most of  the married women ?

It has nothing to do with where and whom I live with now…..I love my new family….and I now have 2 homes. Feels great.But when I think/talk about ‘my house ‘ its always my parents place. Thats the one which strikes instinctively. It isn’t even an issue in the first place then why do I sometimes ruminate at length about it ?